Monday, March 30, 2009

Pointless Argument #4: You Suck.

Here I am, itching for a fight...and where are you? Huh?

What the fuck do I have to do to get some action around here? Do I have to go tease my neighbor's pitbull?

9 comments:

  1. Posted by theevilsupergenius
    No what sucks is trying to respond to your attacks at the airport via iPhone while the lady next to you eats the stinkiest food available at SEA/TAC. That sucks. Oh and your stereotypical depiction of pit bulls sucks too. I'm going to have to send Nikita down there to teach you a lesson. Shell steal your chair in a heartbeat.

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  2. Really. As a so-called evilsupergenius, I should think you'd be able to devise a way to deal with the stinky food lady. Personally, I never travel without a glass vial full of fire ants. But that's just me.

    I was so full of rage, I did go tease the neighbor's pitbull. She gave me a thorough licking -- the slobbery kiss kind. So that's on your head, too.

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  3. Oh, did it rust your tin foil hat? Why would I feel bad about you getting some puppy kisses?

    As far as fire ants, they TSA has really cracked down on that lately. Those bastards in shockingly pretty blue shirts.

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  4. You'd think an evilsupergenius would know how to work around the TSA crackdown on fire ants, but I guess I'm not too surprised by your ignorance.

    I like to carry my glass vial of fire ants the same way I smuggle smack: up my hoo-ha. This is not for everyone, I'll admit that...especially if you're obsessive about doing your Kegels.

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  5. But my hoo-ha is already packed with razor blades, cigarette lighters and pocket knives. You must be fairly well stretched out to be able to add a useful sized vial of fire ants in there too.

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  6. Oh riiiillllly. That's sooooo interesting. Razor blades, you say? How do you manage to bypass the metal detector, I wonder?

    Hmmmm, it's quite a mystery...unless you're not being 100% truthful? I wonder...

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  7. I use ceramic razor blades. Seriously are you that out of the loop?

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  8. furthermore, for about $50 in Brazil you can get a doctor to provide false documentation on your hip replacement that will explain any metal detector beeping should you need to smuggle internal metal.

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  9. I'm not out of the loop, I just don't require all that paraphernalia. You see, my hands are licensed as lethal weapons.

    Actually, my whole body has been insured for 5 billion dollars because of my unparalleled martial arts and street-fighting abilities.

    Do you have any idea what would happen if you came at me with one of those ceramic razor blades? You don't want to find out, I assure you.

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